Small mistakes, Big consequences.

I was talking to my friend about how our little choices makes a difference in our current state. How it all snowballs and affects how our future would have been. How our choices determines our present and what are those choices. For myself personally there have been way too many cross roads in my life. I now, wished sometimes I took a different route.

1) mixing with the wrong crowd in secondary school.
- I mixed with the "cool" crowd and neglected my studies.

2) Smoking and drinking
- If I didn't I would have saved up even more money.

3) Not joining a sport for CCA in secondary school.
- If I had I would have accomplished much much more.

4) Never got persuaded to started gaming.
- I would not have been addicted to games and studied more and also not get influenced by the stuff on internet.

5) Working during poly days.
- I would have gotten better grades.

6) Joining Canoeing in poly
- I might not have gotten to national team. I might not have accomplish something in poly. BUT I might not have so much pride and confidence in myself.

7) Entering into Nationals
- I wouldn't have quitted canoeing at the final few months of my year 2 in poly.

8) Slacking for a month after I finished my final exams in poly
- would have saved more money and not get so complacent.

9) Doing my best in BMT.
- Things would have been different, I would not have been labeled as a threat by those OCS want-to-go people and have a more enjoyable time during BMT.

But all the above are small mistakes Which I think mattered little to me. Obviously IF I had not done as I did I would be a very different man. One who is most probably atheletic, studious, innocent and most probably A LOT richer. But these mistakes also allowed me to meet the people who I care about deeply, allowed me to meet those close to me and of cos those who I HAD fun with.

However THESE are my BIGGEST regrets, thing would have been A LOT DIFFERENT if I didn't do this.

10) leaving church after a disagreement and other complications.
- I wouldn't have been away from God for 2-3 years.
- I would have been serving in a greater way.

11) Playing basketball out of my own schedule during FS course.
- I wouldn't have spent 5 months in pain.
- I would have passed out as a FS getting 400 dollars more per month.
- I MIGHT have gotten the golden bayonet and course best PT.
- I wouldn't have had quarrels with certain friends.
- I wouldn't have been depressed.
- I would have gotten my FIC and NCAP level 2.
- I would have been enjoying my life right now.
- I wouldn't have felt so emotionally stressed out now.
- I would have still remained close to SOMEONE.
- I wouldn't have changed this much.
- I wouldn't have forced myself to make a decision to cut off some bonds with others that I treasure even till now. In hopes that I would have become more like myself after a long period of time.


In these mistakes/crossroads in my life I know for sure, God's hand was there moving me closer to him and drawing me to him. Through all these trials and testing I've seen His power, His love and His grace.

For the 10th and 11th I regret it immensely, I wished I could turn back time and reverse it. I wish it never happened. It pains me physically, emotionally and spiritually greatly. All I can pray for and believe in is that God's hand is indeed in motion in this mistake. That it is indeed for His power, love and grace for me to go through this.

I shall not be like the children of Israel in the wilderness and complain about God leading me through trials. What's done is done. All I can believe is that my God will lead me through, His grace is sufficent and that His ways are higher than my ways His thoughts higher than my thoughts.


Isaiah 55:8-10
"For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,"
declares the LORD.

"As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.

Jeremiah 29:10-12

This is what the LORD says: "When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will come to you and fulfill my gracious promise to bring you back to this place. For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.