I thank God for friends who understand how and what I think. I thank God for them thinking in a similar fashion so that when I don't want to. They can remind me of what and how I think. The go and get mindset instead of the wait and see mindset.

Friends who understand the simple fact that. It's impossible for me to aim for a just pass in anything. I'll only strive towards being the best that I can be in every task I focus on. Friends who can read my emotions even behind those masks.

So in a way, I need more male fellowship with guys who are around my age, think like me or is around the same calibre. As the saying goes birds of the same feather flock together. Guys like us always don't flock together enough because we are busy doing things and surrounded by people who are just not like us.

So in a way, I should start gathering these brothers and have a more regular way or mode of fellowship.

A song that I'm falling in love with. WOOTS! haha. Every little thing by dishwalla. Enjoy!




Let me in
to see you in the morning light
to get me on and all along the tears they come
see all come
I want you to believe in life
but I get the strangest feeling that you've gone away
will you find out who you are too late to change?
I wish I could be
every little thing you wanted
all the time
I wish I could be
every little thing you wanted
all the time
some times

lift me up
just lift me up don't make a sound
and let me hold you up before you hit the Ground
see all come
you say your all right
but I get the strangest feeling
that you've gone away- you've gone away
and will you find out who you are too late to change?

I wish I could be
every little thing you wanted
all the time
I wish I could be
every little thing you wanted
all the time
some times

Don't give me up
don't give me up tonight
or soon nothing will be right at all
salvation
will you find out who you are too late to change?

I wish I could be
every little thing you wanted

Some thoughts of the week, as I have been coaching swimming for the past 2 weeks I've come once again into a lot of contact with kids and realised why I enjoy teaching young children. It's that they are so pure without any hidden motives and issues that accompany associating or relating to teenagers and young adults alike. They show their love freely, speak what's on their mind. But most of all their hearts are very pure.

We live in a very fast paced society. Many a times people forget the simple pleasures in life. Things such as chilling out with nice wine, reading a good novel, munching on chocolates and sticking your finger into jam/honey and just eating it like that. We tend to focus on goals, expectations, targets and agendas. What happened to the (in my opinion the more important things in life) spending time with your family, making an effort to spend time with those who care about you, etc.

People make use of others to in a way meet their own needs. Or rather most of us do that. We fail to realise and remember how it was when we were kids. To do those things that we once enjoyed as a child. Where there were no agendas, no targets, no goals and expectations. Where we talked to one another or to our parents just because we wanted to spend time with them. Even when we were pushed aside or upset or hurt it will be forgotten the next moment. Where our family spent time eating out together or cooking together or even a simple picnic could bring great joy.

Is it really true that gone were the days where we can just do the things we enjoy and still meet our agenda or expectations in life. Or is it that we have failed to realise what are the important things in life. It's never about acheiving success without happiness. It's not about acheivements or results but the process. Have we forgotten all about the key to living. It's not about what you can do, but rather what you have enjoyed experincing and doing.

Do we work for money or for our purpose? Is this what the bible meant in Mathew 18:2-4
He called a little child and had him stand among them.
And he said: "I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.
Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.

Is it to forget about your goals, targets, agendas and expectations and to become like a child. to do what we enjoy trusting God wholeheartedly. Forgeting about our hurts and unhappiness the next instance. To forgive without asking. To love without agendas. To care without motives. To take the humble pie and forget our past acheivements living in the present.

However that does not mean that we behave in a childish manner without discernment and maturity. But for our hearts to become as pure as a child once again.

So with these thoughts in mind I pray.

Father, all things that are before me right now I leave them up to You. The past glory and acheivements are things you have graced me with. Let me once again have the heart of a child. To forgive without asking. To love without agendas. To care without motives. Let me not live in the past but the present. Let the trials that I have been through shape me and let me be able to forget all the pain. Being a child in my heart but also coupled with the discernment that I've gained over the years and holding on to the way I should carry myself according to what You have set ahead for me.

p.s. pardon my terrible grammar in this post it's like 04 39 and i'm sleepy.

A new song that I think it's really cool. It's from an artist that no one really hears from.



The best thing that you never had

Hello how you doing?
What's it like to ruin all my self esteem
Let me blow off some steam
For 5 years I've waited,
So why am I jaded to get back at you
What makes it cool

When you act like nothing ever happened
I feel like I should feel bad
But I can't like someone who thought
They're the only one that mattered
I hope that you're flattered
Cause you broke this down
The best thing that you never had

And it seems like a loss somehow
My heart got lost on the way to my head
And my brain cells are dead
And the craziness shows
Now I start to go when the green turns to red
And I should be dead

When you act like nothing ever happened
I feel like I should feel bad
But I can't like someone who thought
They're the only one that mattered
While my heart got shattered like romantic roadkill
My heart is all splattered your ego got fatter
And I hope that you're flattered
Cause you broke this down
The best thing that you never had

Like the toilet seat never got lifted
And I pissed on your confidence
When you weren't around, how can that be?
Don't turn this around
You were the one
Who drove my ass right to the ground

When you act like nothing ever happened
I feel like I should feel bad, and I can't like

Someone who thought
They're the only one that mattered
While my heart got shattered like romantic roadkill
My heart is all splattered your ego got fatter
And I hope that you're flattered
Cause you broke this down
You broke this down
The best thing, the best thing,
The best thing that you never had

You never had...

A quote from prince of persia which by the way IS an awesome movie!

A good man plunge courageously into danger to save others. A great man stops it from even happening and you my son has the potential of an exceedingly great man.

Which I think God sees that in all of us.

For that I thank Him for giving me grace and blessings for this tough time ahead. I've finished my struggles and the finacial breakthroughs are on their way. I also believe it more than just finacial blessings coming my wayand more door are going to open up.

I also thank God for providing me with great friends around me. A few example are Basil, Ching Ee, Esmond, Jack, yoksan and some of my poly friends. I don't know if you guys read my blog. But thank you for being there for me through this tough times. You guys might not know it, But your help/presence in my tough times has helped me tide through it.

To Basil and Ching, I believe that we are more than just friends. We're closer to a family and I love you guys.

Tough times don't last tough men do. DORYA! SORYA!

Well the news about COC making a din about our church again and straits time publiscing it. Honestly speaking I think it's not fair about to our church leadership especially pst Kong. To add on, I think it was pretty ridiculous. If you read the article yesterday carefully it was laced with pretty much a lot of contridictions.

1) you detain Pst Kong for something to do with the misuse of funds. After which in the same page you said that he has not been taking salary from the church.
2) you put on the picture of the sign that the office is closed in that article. How misleading is that? When the reason for the closure is to allow the staff to rest.
3) You put on in a small paragraph claiming that this has nothing to do with the suntec deal.
4) the paper has just painted the church in the worse light possible after the suntec city saga. without thinking about what the church has done. eg. humanitarian works, CHCSA, disater relief.

I believed that this is just a opposition from the world due to us growing. It's like our influence is getting bigger and so in a way the world is trying to contain us. But I'm sure after all this we'll come out of it even stronger because we serve a God that cannot be limited.

I have full confidence in the leadership of the church that this claim is just something that people conspire because we are rising up. The obivious tall poppy symdrome.

After all that is said i think the media isn't being fair to our church. But if you read carefully you'll see contridictions and weak points being made. eg. the way sun dresses, the way we manage to build God a great house, etc.

So, we'll just let time and God prove our case to the world.

A church isn't about the building but the people that makes it up.