I feel like a loser. Seriously. Thanks once again. For making me feel this way. I thought this Xmas would be a time of reconciliation but you spoilt the mood totally. Once again, thanks for making me feel loserish. I don't know if you know who you are but kudos to you. Really kudos to you.

Snippets of songs from never shout never.

I'm a little bit insecure,
From all of this mis-treatment.
But see I'm working it out,
I'm working it out,
It's so damn hard,
When your alone.

I am running out of words
To say to you,
Wondering why I'm wasting my time,
Thinking back and wondering why,
I'm such a fool for loving you.

And I got to the point where,
All I wanted was for us to make up,
But its not that easy.
Cause girl you move on so quickly,
Keeping a boy like me at the edge of his seat

And I was one who thought I was the strong one,
Well you proved me wrong,
Now I'm singing along,
To every song on the radio i don't wanna go,
Come on baby tell me something I wanna know,
And I don't wanna see what is on my mind,
Because this lack of motivations,
Taking over my time and I'm sick of trying.

For the next 30 days. I shall not tweet or facebook. I shall not express myself in words in regards to my emotions on the internet. I shall only post songs or snippets of it on my blog for the next 30 days IF I do blog.

I hope you're glad with what you've done to me.
I lay in bed all day long feeling melachony
can somebody kill me please.
somebody kill me please.
I'm on my knees please please please
KILL ME
I want to die.
Put a bullet in my head~!

Wedding singer the movie.

No matter what, I'll not be the pillar of salt.

Stop looking back, stop thinking back. Stop wishing that things never turned out this way. Gotta stop wishing that I never allowed myself to be forced into saying the decision I have made.

I thought it hurts to struggle alone. But it hurts more having to cut off things that were dear to me.


Right now, Your grace is the only thing that pulls me through, O Lord.
Well, off to camp right now.

Just the way you are.

Oh her eyes, her eyes make the stars look like they’re not shining
Her hair, her hair falls perfectly without her trying
She’s so beautiful, and I tell her everyday

Yeah, I know, I know when I compliment her she wont believe me
And its so, its so sad to think she don’t see what I see
But every time she asks me do I look okay I say

Chorus
When I see your face, there’s not a thing that I would change
Cause you’re a-mazing, just the way you are
And when you smile, the whole world stops and stares for a while
Cause you’re a-mazing, just the way you are

Her lips, her lips I could kiss them all day if she’d let me
Her laugh, her laugh she hates but I think its so sexy
She’s so beautiful, and I tell her every day

Oh you know, you know, you know Id never ask you to change
If perfect is what you’re searching for, then just stay the same
So, don’t even bother asking if you look okay, you know I say

Chorus
When I see your face, there’s not a thing that I would change
Cause you’re a-mazing, just the way you are
And when you smile, the whole world stops and stares for a while
Cause you’re a-mazing, just the way you are

Bridge
The way you are, the way you are
Girl you’re amazing Just the way you are

Chorus
When I see your face, there’s not a thing that I would change
Cause you’re a-mazing, just the way you are
And when you smile, the whole world stops and stares for a while

Cause you’re a-mazing, just the way you are

It hurts but, it the best for me. 长痛不如短痛.

I'll want to close this chapter. This story. This book.

If you want you can start a new one or end it.

My feelings towards you won't change. And I don't want to do anything that causes me more pain.


It is hard. But I have to make this choice else I will only be suffering in misery and bitterness for a long time. I know what you might be saying about me blogging about you again. But, yea. If this friendship matters to you do something about it. For me, I'm not gonna hope, want or expect anything. If you do, it's a bonus for me. If you don't I think I'll be fine with it.

Gonna aim to be back to normal. Back to who I was and even better.

Went for water baptism today. It's gonna be a new start for me. Even though things didn't miraculously change to be just a walk in the park for me. I know it'll never be. BUT! From now on, I refuse, I refuse to feel anything but optimism.

Pain is an inhibitor of strenght.
Pain reminds us that we're hurt.
Pain reminds us not to excersise or stress out the injured area for it to heal.

What's true for the natural is true for the spiritual.
So in a sense, hurts can't be heal if it is constantly being stress out and continually happening. Broken and empty promises hurts the injured party even more.

So either live up to your own promises or tell the party you can't.



What people desire between the bonds with others is not obligation. But sincere effort and care. Be real, as real as you can ever be. Don't be moved by guilt or obligation for that would be the greatest insult. - unknown.

I can't recall of one incident where effort was put in since the day the book was given to me. Did you even bother?

The power of marketing. The power of advertisment. Somehow they seem to be selling a dream, a vision.

If so, why shouldn't the Church be the one doing so. The word of God says that, your young man shall dream dreams and your old man shall see visions.

What is the vision/dream you're selling? What is the image you potray? For we are the very advertisment of God's kingdom, grace and mercy.

Just a thought that came to me while I was reading about marketing. Sometimes God impresses things like that just throug your daily life. Simply love getting insights like this every single day!